judge: sir, you are being charged with distribution of child pornography, the murder of 8,000 people and purchasing an illegal drugs…what do you gotta say for yourself?
me: i activate mirror force! now you will be charged with distribution of child pornography, the murder of 8,000 people and purchasing of illegal drugs.
judge:
(via what-is-this-i-dont-even)
Source: dekutree
For what seems like an eternity rumors about a Dave Chappelle stand-up comedy tour have swirled. Now they’re finally coming to fruition.!!!!!
(via whereimaginationdies)
Source: uproxx
Source: herochan
I’ts looking like my flow may actually destroy people’s laptops when they play my EP
The Perks of Being a Real Nigga
(via dropkicktiff)
Source: ridge
That was a strange, short, nice, hopeful conversation with my Dad.
I guess we’re on some sort of terms again… I like this…
I have to do a podcast in an hour but I want to go to sleep now
Just talked to my Dad for the first time in… years… Even if it was for only like 45 seconds, hes gonna call me back, this is so weird… Cool though I guess. I just wanna patch things up and have some sort of relationship with him already. Lets see how this goes, im fucking nervous though I’ll tell you that much
Not only am I writing some pretty great lyrics right now but I’m also writing some new stand-up material for the first time in fucking forever
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My Name is David Acosta. I am a 20 year old guy from New Jersey. I'm in college for theatre, I'm an actor, a rapper, a comedian, and always a student.
